Sep 232008
 

According to Happeh Theory, masturbation will make a human being blind and crippled, as well as causing many other changes to the human body. One of those changes is asymmetry of the body. Masturbation caused bodily asymmetry affects both the body and head. The picture below is an example of a masturbation changed face.

A line is then drawn along the center of the face that divides the face into right and left halves.

The dividing line helps to see the differences between each side of the asymmetric face. The right side of the face looks much larger,

than the left side of the face.

The right ear looks bigger,

than the left ear.

The right ear sticks out away from the head,

while the left ear is pulled in towards the head.

The right side of the mouth angles down,

while the left side of the mouth angles up.

The right side of the mouth is closed,

while the left side of the mouth is partially opened.

The right eyebrow is higher,

than the left eyebrow.

The hair on the more normal looking right side of the face has a smooth-ish look to it,

while the hair on the masturbation changed left side of the face looks uneven and unruly.

The right cheek has a smooth curve to it,

while the left cheek looks more like an angular line.

Right Handed Masturbation is responsible for all of the changes to the man’s face. The main overall change Right Handed Masturbation causes to the face is to shrink the left side of the face and head. A review of the previously listed changes to the left side of the face will reveal that almost all of them can intuitively be linked to the actions of a contracting or shrinking force. 

  21 Responses to “The Daily Insight 09-23-08 – Masturbation Caused Asymmetric Faces”

  1. Masturbation has nothing to do with this guy’s face problem, & to prove it please post his childhood face picture & his preteen face picture. not only that, i know people Masturbation 5 times a day & thier face is more then perfect!

    • They were probably ugly cross-eyed kids with enormous ears and thanks to years of intense masturbation they were able to solve those problems…

  2. THESE PICTURES REPRESENT EITHER CRANIAL NERVE PALSIES FROM A VIRAL INFECTION KNOWN AS BELLS PALSY OR OTHER MECHANISMS AS WELL AS SOME MAY BE FROM A CVA ON THE SIDE OF THE BRAIN OPPOSITE TO THE DOOPING OF THE FACIAL MUSCULATURE. WHAT DUMBASS IS RELATING THIS TO MASTURBATION???? I AM ASSUMING THIS IS SOME TYPE OF MEDICAL EDUCATIONAL HUMOR. OR LETS DAMN WELL HOPE SO !!!

  3. You are fuckin nuts! 😀 I can’t belive that you are serious. At first, I tought that this is some kind of satiric page.

  4. Interesting insights about the consequences of massive masturbation practices. However, the most usual aftereffect of regular wanking is early hair loss.

  5. Hi man you make perfect sense. I am wondering are these effect reversible I did research on this and found a couple of people saying that after they quite masturbation there face and body become symmetrical( i.e. before right shoulder lower than left then they become even).same with face.

  6. How to recover to normal face.

  7. Start no fap challenge …..you will have more symmetrival face,sharper memmory,moreclarity in talking,and more confidence

  8. Do you imply that right handed masturbation would shrink the left side of the face and overall left side of the body. This seems to be in contrast with the claims of the theory. Using right hand for masturbation should lead to shrinkage of the right side of rhe face and body. Isn’t it ?

    • If so is the case then your video on youtube stating ,”the extreme shrinkage of the mouth will be caused on the same side as the hand used for masturbation”. What a bunch of balony, a theory contradicting its own self !

        • Or is there a mis-statement of some kind ?

          • I would attribute the difference in claims to both the severity of masturbation changes and the way masturbation is performed.

            Some large number of people will lean towards the masturbating hand. That is what the man in the video is doing. His body clearly leans over to his right side. That leaning is linked to the upwards movement of the right side of his mouth. The upward stroke of masturbation acts as if it pulls up the side of his mouth as well as pulling up on his penis. The man in the video would be a man that masturbated frequently but gave himself relief relatively quickly by ejaculating relatively quickly. His relatively light right hand masturbation technique has shrunken the right side of his body mainly. Even though he has most likely masturbated for a long time because he is an older man, the lightness and shortness of his masturbation technique has limited the masturbation changes to his body to tightening and shrinkage of the right side.

            The man above on this webpage would be an example of a man who most likely masturbates for long periods of time before he ejaculates, or someone who masturbates, ejaculates, then keeps on masturbating. The extreme tension or pressure of prolonged masturbation would likely tilt his body forward and to twist the right side forwards and the left side to the rear. It is that twisting of the torso that has affected the left side so strongly.

            You can mimic what happens to the man on this web page by taking your right hand, and reaching around the back of your head towards your mouth as far as you can. You will most likely only be able to reach your ear. Grab your left ear with your right hand and gently pull. The feeling in your head that movement generates is the same action that masturbation is exerting to change the man’s face. The left side of his head is going backwards while the right side of his head is moving forwards.

            So I would attribute the difference between the two men to (A) The physical severity and length of time differences between each man, and (B) the exact way each man masturbates. Meaning exactly how they hold their hand. The man in the video probably masturbates with the base of his palm towards his crotch and his index finger up by the head of his penis. There is a strong possibility that the man on this web page masturbates with his hand reversed. His index finger and thumb are back by his crotch, while the palm of his hand is up by the head of his penis.

            Since you seem so interested in this subject, try an experiment on yourself. Hold your penis with the palm of your hand by your crotch and the index finger by the head of your penis. Then tighten your hand by some amount. You should feel your armpit tighten up and pull your torso down towards your right side or right hip.

            Then try a different grip. Grab your penis with the index finger and thumb by your crotch and your palm by the head of your penis. Right off the bat you should notice that your elbow is not projecting out and forwards of your body. A completely different location than the close in position of the elbow to the body using the other method. If you tried stroking using this method you might feel more of a pull over on the left side of your body. If you do not feel a pull on the left side of the body, you will certainly notice that there is no pull on the elbow down to the right or right hip.

            Play around with the two different grips. Do it lightly. Do it strongly. Try to relax your body. Or maybe do it with a tight body.

            If you experiment enough you should be able to demonstrate to yourself almost all of the claims of Happeh Theory. The body is a mechanical device that is connected in a particular way and can only move in certain directions in reaction to certain stresses.

      • You might find contradictory statements amongst all of the thousands of words associated with this website and/or the videos. I am not perfect.

  9. what are its cure

  10. does nofap corrects your assymetrical face??

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